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I LOVE stamping, but have I done it lately? erm uhm *kicks dirt ... stalls* nope.. Believe me when I say I have ALL the time now to do it, but haven't... As I was telling DH this morning I take it out to make some and then "feel" guilty cuz I have things I should be doing around the house... picking up/cleaning.. reorganizing things that now are in need of it (kitchen/closets)
This is the first time in my life I've ever been I guess what you call a stay at home mom.. was by choice... long story.. I'm use to working sometimes 50-60 hours a week without batting an eye.. now I'm like a bump on a log and do not know what to do ..
So who has retired or quit work by choice of their own or not.. and now has this huge amount of time to do whatever ? Btw.. I still get up at 5:30 to get my daughter up for school.. iron her clothes and make her breakfast.. I did that when I was working too.. Just now it is different it seems...
Oh one more thing.. I have what you might call an order *puzzled look* for my vets office to do some cards for their clients and I have some of them done.. I just cant seem to get the right frame of mind (that goes back to the first paragraph btw)
I think I can identify with you. Yesterday, I retired ---- for the 3rd time! I have worked outside the home for most of my adult life and, I think, when you are used to working alot - especially the number of hours you were working, it's pretty hard to go "cold turkey" with such a big change. Maybe it's about the structure of work - maybe try setting set up a schedule for your day at first (even keep a calendar for the day and week). Ease into your new life. Set up so much time for house work, so much time for stamping, etc. That seems to help me. Anyway - just a thought. Enjoy this exciting part of your life's journey.
DON'T FEEL GUILTY!! You have worked hard most of your life!! Now it's time for YOU!! Take the time to do some things you enjoy!! If you don't do them now....you may never have the chance again!!
I'm right there with you, Fran. I sometimes think we get more done when we're under a time crunch. Since I retired a year ago, I've gotten much less done...I always have this feeling of "I can do it tomorrow". It's taken a long time, but I'm starting to get back more into the swing of things. I use my crafts as a "reward" for doing the necessaries. Like if I clean the kitchen in the morning, I give myself the afternoon to play. Also, try doing some multi-tasking...do laundry while you're stamping (use the time you spend folding and putting away to let projects dry), or get the roast on and play while it cooks. Little things like that can help, I find.
But don't feel guilty! That's a sure way to talk yourself right into doing nothing at all then you get down on yourself about that which makes you feel more guilty which...it's all a self-defeating situation. You end up being nearly paralyzed, not a good thing.
Start by just doing one thing...and concentrate on that, not on what you didn't do, know what I mean? One step/day at a time and you'll come around, I'm sure of it!
Housework is like a good friend...always there when you need it!! You can knock your socks off all day long ..cleaning..dusting..scrubbing..polishing...the whole nine yards. Hubby and kids come home and in 15 minutes the whole place looks like a clothing bomb went off! Forget it..don't knock your self out and beat yourself up feeling guilty. Set some time aside in the afternoon say 1-3:00 and make sure you are as ridged and disciplined about your craft time as you are about the vacuuming and dishes if that helps get your head around it. Remember a non messy house is only temporary! LOL Enjoy your free time...and good luck with that.
I agree with Michelle328 on many grounds. multi-tasking, I do it all the time. Laundry and crafting go hand in hand at my house. And what is one to do when the kitchen floor is drying? create of course! but most of all don't feel guilty. Sometimes I find making a list helps....Not a list of everything that HAS to get done that day, maybe just a list of things you'd like to accomplish for the week. As things get done, cross them off.
I was off work for a month last May after having foot surgery. After the first week of being banished to the sofa with only getting up to use the bathroom, I was left with 3 weeks on my own all day. Now, granted I was limited with what I could do because I was on crutches and not allowed any weight on my foot, I had to do something! So I set myself a schedule. Every morning after breakfast, I would go to the dining room, (my temporary work area), to start creating. I had my laptop there so I could listen to my favorite radio station online. I would break for lunch at 1 for an hour and then go back to "work" until 5. Having a schedule really helped. Now towards the end of the time at home I did take a day where I just veged on the sofa and watched old movies...including Gone With the Wind...uninterrupted.
Girl, if I gave in every time I felt guilty for doing "my thing" (crafting), instead of cleaning, then my house would be immaculate. There's a saying that goes "Housework won't kill you, buy why take the chance?". I've adopted that motto, somewhat. I keep my kitchen clean and the floors uncluttered on a daily basis. The rest of the house comes in a close second to enjoying life.
I worked for many years (also 50-60 hrs a week), before I became disabled. My boys are of the age where they can clean up after themselves (in fact I insist upon it!). Heck, they can even cook! My mother-in-law is horrified that I make the boys cook and clean, but I'll bet money that their future wives are going to LOVE me!!
Life's short. Enjoy yourself. Besides, it sounds like you are making a little pocket change doing your cards, so that is a bonus!!
My boys are of the age where they can clean up after themselves (in fact I insist upon it!). Heck, they can even cook! My mother-in-law is horrified that I make the boys cook and clean, but I'll bet money that their future wives are going to LOVE me!!!
Short hijack... my daughter-in-law did thank me for teaching my son to cook, clean, do laundry and sew.... because she never learned from her mom!
Guilt is over-rated, give yourself "you time"!
__________________ Sue
...no matter where you are, there you are! my gallery
After doing the 50- 60 hours a week rat race - and bringing work home to boot, it was quite a shock to be retired. I'm feel very fortunate that I was able to retire at a young age, but my DH said - "i know you, you won't sit still long" and he is right! Try and set yourself a schedule - I attempt to do the challenges on SCS daily. I don't always make it but it gives me that extra push.
As for housework, my house could be ALOT cleaner! But I set aside one day per week for the major housework while doing the little things daily. As far as things like cleaning out the closet etc, I finally (after 6 years in this house) cleaned out the laundry room!
I just had my DH hang a sign I found at the mall in my craft room. IT says: I understand the concept of COOKING AND CLEANING. Just not as it applies to me. My other favorite sayings include the one Holly mentioned, and "House work makes you ugly!"
I am a SAHM with 2 boys (4 and 20 mos) and a soldier for a DH. I spend my day running after my little monkeys. I REFUSE to let myself feel bad for putting of things like cleaning out the closet to get a little ME time!
I miss work. I do think I got more done in a day BEFORE I started staying at home. I can actually say I miss working in a Salon during the day and then working nights at BK. I miss the paycheck and the running. But it is so worth it. I don't know much about retirment... I think you do just need to find a groove that works for you.
I can SO relate. After being single and working full-time for all my life, I got married, moved 300+ miles away and was jobless at the age of 39-3/4! I suddenly had nothing but normal housework and stamping (didn't know anyone and the job market was slow). It finally dawned on me that: #1 - I need the stimulus of getting out of the house and working; #2 - I was deadline-motivated and I just didn't have any real deadlines so there was never a sense of urgency to get anything done!
I found some of my mojo again when I got a part-time job and involved in some volunteer work - woohoo! I found a bit more when I justified stamping time by requiring myself to get certain household tasks done first. I still sometimes feel guilty stamping when my hubby's at work, but he doesn't begrudge me my crafting time, so I need to ditch that false guilt. And there are still times when my work hours are fewer and I feel that ol' "lack of urgency" about household chores and I don't accomplish a darn thing - not even stamping. But it doesn't come nearly as often as it used to.
I used to beat myself up and everyone in my house. You could do a white glove test and it was perfect. I am not exaggerating. Then about 10 years ago I decided what would people say when I died...she kept her house perfect. How boring. Now don't take me wrong it's still clean but not perfect. I quit working 2 years ago. I have worked all my life so much like many of the ladies here it was a hard adjustment. I am loving it now. I am already working on Christmas presents. I try to stamp everyday. If my husband asks me what I did today I tell him I played in my room. He loves it. He enjoys me enjoying my free time.
So I have no idea if you are involved with a church or some such thing, but there are a bunch of threads on spiritual ministry cards, or really whatever floats your boat (think disabled kids, soldiers, etc). Maybe it would help if you set a goal of creating ( ? 5 a week or something) cards to give to a cause, and then in your head you could justify spending the time playing on whatever you want. When I feel this way, in the past I have made cards for someone else, so I felt OK with me time.
I think this was easier to say in person than by typing. Hope it makes sense to someone.
Leah
The sign that hangs on my entry door says: Martha doesn't live here . . . . . .. Probably shouldn't admit that . . .lol.
I've learned that the house isn't that important but relationships with those I love are and I do take the time to create memories with those I love.
I work to live - I don't live to work. (Absolutely hate working with other folks that live to work and stir sh_t and create drama in the workplace - so my home is my sanctuary.) And the husband agrees that my craft room is probably cheaper than therapy!
Last edited by corgicountry; 04-24-2010 at 06:36 PM..
Don't feel guilty about your stamping time. I was off work for several years, and while I was off, I made my job working in my craft area for a minimum of 30 min per day, some days more. It didn't have to be stamping, it could just be playing with techniques, but I was in there. When you think of what you have invested in your craft, I know mine is a very sizable investment, then it is a shame to let it sit and not be used.
"My house was clean yesterday, sorry you missed it!! " Always makes me smile!!
I subscribe to the Fly Lady rule of daily chores and 15 minutes of whatever else. That gives me about 10 hours to WHATEVER (on weekends,since I unfortunately still work 60 hours a week).
OK, so I thought about it more. For me, "working" at a paying job felt like I was contributing to society. If I am not working outside the home, I feel like I need to contribute to society in some other way, like by making cards for a cause, in order to better justify my creating just for me. Is that making sense?
Leah
Oh Fran, you definitely shouldn't feel guilty about a bit of you time.
As Mrs Noofy said, a clean house doesn't last long. I believe in clean, but tidy? It doesn't last long after the cleaning, but that's OK.
I think that when I was at home full-time I found it harder to actually structure time in for crafting, although after my mother died, making a card each day was my therapy. Working part-time means I have to structure my time better.
But no, no, no - don't feel guilty.
Maybe set aside an hour or more in the day and designate it as craft time - if you found it when you were working, you surely still have it now.
But the mojo, that's a different thing...
I know we all have slumps now and again, but maybe it's also related to the change in circumstances? I've noticed it with people who retire at whatever stage, they are so used to being busy that they think the day still needs to be full, and there's a time for adjusting to that and changing pace and mindset. Just enjoy some of all that time you now have - if I wouldn't miss the money too much I'd love to be SAH again.
I'm probably not expressing what's in my mind very clearly.
Why are the closets/kitchen suddenly in need of urgent re-organising now when they weren't a month ago, LOL. Leave them, one day you'll be in the mood to do them .
Oh, I hate that word "justify"! You don't need to justify yourself or anything you do! And you ARE contributing to society by crafting. Everyone who sees your work, either in person or on a gallery will gain something from it. Keeping yourself sane and not going "postal" makes a contribution. Consider the big picture: if you're pleased with something you've created it makes you feel good. Then, you go to the grocery store and because you feel good, you smile at a passerby. That person is having a bad day and your smile made it a bit better. That person may then smile at someone else and that person feels good enough about it to speak to the elderly person in front of them at the checkout. This makes her happy because she doesn't have much interaction with other folks...and so on. Remember that we all have much more affect on others than we may realize
OH my gosh, I need to cut and paste all of the comments in this thread!! I didn't read them all, but those first few really hit home. You aren't alone! I leave for work at 5pm and get back around 9pm, so I'm at home all day. I am NOT a lazy person, and work really hard at work. I have found that structuring my day and rewarding myself with a little stamping/scrapbooking after I've accomplished something makes me more productive, and makes me better enjoy my free time.
Thanks Ladies (and if your DH's made a comment over shoulder, thanks guys)
I've read them all.. took a bit.. and I'm stealing time on my daughters PC while she does the dishes as mine went pfffffffffffft today :( And since I have no PC in my craft room at the moment tonight will be a card night while Dancing with the stars is on.. LOL I've had a stamp sitting on my desk for a while now saying.. ok I'm GOING to do something with it.. and because I just dont "have" to it will be all the more fun. It is a just because kind.
When I can I will post it so you can see.. again thanks for all the comments and support of the do not feel guilty or try to justify why I am going to sit down and do a card just because I want some ME time
As my SU Demonstrator often says when she sends emails... RUBBER HUGSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I worked at the same place for 33 years when my job was eliminated. At first it was great, I did lots of house projects that is hard to do when you are working. But as winter months approached, I became reclusive and did not want to do anything (not even stamp). I took a little part time job to give me some structure and force me to get out. I find I need social interaction other people. My advice: volunteer or take a part time job(but only something you love), get some exercise, stamp when you feel like it, and clean house only when necessary. It takes time to adjust, but you will find your way. Good luck.
I retired once about 5 years ago from being a high school principal. I went from being totally consumed to being totally non-commited. I didn't decide what we would eat or where we would go for about 6 months. It took that long to retrain my brain!!!! Never feel guilty about spending time creating. It makes you much better at the other things you do. I am lucky enough to have a "craft hut" in my back yard and my things can be left out, so I don't worry about the mess. Guilt is a gift from our Puritan forefathers! Let it go!!!
I LOVE stamping, but have I done it lately? erm uhm *kicks dirt ... stalls* nope.. Believe me when I say I have ALL the time now to do it, but haven't... As I was telling DH this morning I take it out to make some and then "feel" guilty cuz I have things I should be doing around the house... picking up/cleaning.. reorganizing things that now are in need of it (kitchen/closets)
This is the first time in my life I've ever been I guess what you call a stay at home mom.. was by choice... long story.. I'm use to working sometimes 50-60 hours a week without batting an eye.. now I'm like a bump on a log and do not know what to do ..
So who has retired or quit work by choice of their own or not.. and now has this huge amount of time to do whatever ? Btw.. I still get up at 5:30 to get my daughter up for school.. iron her clothes and make her breakfast.. I did that when I was working too.. Just now it is different it seems...
Oh one more thing.. I have what you might call an order *puzzled look* for my vets office to do some cards for their clients and I have some of them done.. I just cant seem to get the right frame of mind (that goes back to the first paragraph btw)
I can so relate to your feelings. Part of my problem may be my childhood where we were told to work and didn't really have any fun time.
I sit here and look at the internet and know I could be stamping because I'm not getting any housework done.
First, the empty nest thing and now... time and we don't know how to deal with it.
Thanks for bringing up this topic so we can discuss it.
Hey! Although I am not in the same situation ( I work 50+ hours a week, easy) I am a teacher and there are times in the year where I have significant down-time (Summer, spring break, christmas break) and I go a little "stir-crazy" and find it hard to focus on crafting.. Something that really helped me sit down and craft on a REGULAR basis was I moved my craft-space downstairs next to the kitchen and living room. I get TONNES done while preparing for meals, helping my son with his homework and I would say that my production has QUADRUPLED since I've done that!
Long story-short.. Can you move your craft area to a more centralized location where you can multi-task??
Good luck!
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Being a sahm is a big change. You are home to notice the things that are not done. Prioritize and do what needs to be done then have some fun. No rules and lots of free time are hard to manage after always being on the go. I fid I get more accomplished when I schedule my day.
Ok so here's the deal
