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Not sure if this should be posted here or in the "family" thread. I love all the cards I see w/the new monogram stamps and also with headline ABCs that depict a letter as a word, like: Celebrate U; Thank U; Love U; B mine, etc you get the picture.
I received a thank you card from my 19yr old freshman college niece for a goody box I sent her. I sent her a card w/"hang in there" from mini mates, because she's facing finals now. She thanked me, then proceeded to write "I think you need to brush up on your English skills, I was disappointed to see that you can't spell "you" and "are", and I feel it's my duty to bring this to your attention." and she continued on insulting me. :(
My handwritten note to her was "R U glad this semester is almost over, like I am?" You see, I work full-time and I'm going to school at night, and I too am almost done w/my semester. Throughout her college freshmen year, I've sent weekly cards so she'd get some snail mail, along with a gift or two for no reason. No one has sent me any "support" cards for my hard work...but I digress, after all I am 40something.
I'm trying get over this shock of a treatment from her. I want to create some of those "letters for words" cards, but wondered if others felt that it wasn't proper. I don't see a problem with them, in fact I think they're down right clever, nor using "short-hand" when jotting a note, or is it all my classroom notetaking, that is spilling into my "life"?
Thanks for listening.
I think she is rude and ungrateful. I would think twice about sending more cards. The R U was cute and hip and she is out of line. Make the letter cards and have fun with them!
oh that just makes my blood boil! She was very very very rude - I think she owe's you an apology... I have my own thoughts about what kind of U card I would be tempted to send.:twisted: :twisted:
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Huh. It would be a stretch for me to think that if anyone sent me a "letter" card that it would mean they were doing something improper. More likely I would think that they were either trying to be creative or they were trying to conserve space on the card! However, that is coming from a fellow stamper... not the average card recipient. I would say that perhaps people tend to "get it" if it's on the card front... not on the actual note inside... but that's just a guess.
And man, I'm an editor by trade and I would never presume to write someone back and correct them after they sent me a lovely card - or many lovely cards over a long time, in this case! Let's hope that as she gets older she realizes that is not the best way to address her "concerns."
Props to you for being such a supportive aunt!
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Last edited by jess_witty; 04-28-2006 at 05:12 PM..
You see, I work full-time and I'm going to school at night, and I too am almost done w/my semester. Throughout her college freshmen year, I've sent weekly cards so she'd get some snail mail, along with a gift or two for no reason. No one has sent me any "support" cards for my hard work...but I digress, after all I am 40something.
Congratulations on the work you are doing! I went back to school finally and graduated six years ago - best think I ever did - even if it was 20 years late!!!!
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Dear Niece, You are not going to recieve anything else from me, as I will be far to busy in my remedial english classes. Thanks for pointing that out for me.
Well, first of all - I think it's rude to correct someone in that manner in this circumstance! To answer your question though - I (this is just MY opinion), I do not like to get notes and/or e-mail with this type of 'short-hand'......... now, I don't mind it as part of a cute card design (on the front of a card) but as far as actually using it as a form of writing....... I don't like it, but I'm not 'insulted'!!!!
:0)
- April C
Definately not. First of all, I am as shocked as you are by her reply. That is pretty bold. Now I would expect it from my mother who is a retired English teacher and is not very internet savey (although she does try). The reaction I get is that it is good natured joking not meant to sound as it does or academic snobery.
Even so, I don't even think my favorite English professor in Universary (I was an English major) would have even said that. He would say and often did that language evolves over time and there are many short forms of words and acronyms that are widely used basically due to the internet. Although R U is not a common concept in cards (it IS an attention getter), it is commonly used on the internet. I know if I looked at my nephews e mails to his friends I would need a translator.
I wouldn't worry about it. Whether the comment was meant to tease in a good natured way, or was a result of academic snobery, I would reply that I wasn't shooting for spelling accuracy, I was trying to grab your attention, so it seems I achieved my goal.
By the way, I don't use letters for words on cards (mostly because I know my mother would freak and she is the only one I know that would) but just may do it now.
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Is it possible she was joking??? I hope-
You should tell her how it made you feel. She probally has no clue. If she is still unappreciative I would not waste my time/talent on her any longer. Move on to someone who appreciates it. Maybe join a RAK group on here where you will get something in return, or a secret sister. Just a thought.
I would send her a "G Thanks" card just to tick her off.
That's funny. Only send her letter cards or cutesy misspelled cards from now on. Hope U have a merry 1 for Christmas. When she graduates be sure to send a ConGRADulations card.
__________________ Taryn
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I sent her a card w/"hang in there" from mini mates, because she's facing finals now. She thanked me, then proceeded to write "I think you need to brush up on your English skills, I was disappointed to see that you can't spell "you" and "are", and I feel it's my duty to bring this to your attention." and she continued on insulting me. :
Dear Niece,
Thank you for your note. I think you need to brush up on your social skills. I am disappointed to see that you can be so rude when I'm trying to do something nice for you. I feel it's my duty to bring this to your attention. Expect to recieve no further packages or support from me in the future.
That would be a great card! You could buy the monogram question mark and maybe stamp the "W", "T", and "F" within the question mark. Oh the possibilities are endless.
Alas, dear niece, it is not I who am lacking in education but you. You need to take a course in manners and etiquette over the summer. Unfortunately the one thing you need cannot be taught and that is kindness toward others as it must come from the heart. Also you need to be thankful that there are those in the world who care enough to send you cards and gifts as there is no requirement to do so.
Dear Niece, You are not going to recieve anything else from me, as I will be far to busy in my remedial english classes. Thanks for pointing that out for me.
Thank you for your note. I think you need to brush up on your social skills. I am disappointed to see that you can be so rude when I'm trying to do something nice for you. I feel it's my duty to bring this to your attention. Expect to recieve no further packages or support from me in the future.
Insulted beyond belief,
Autie Cher
That's what I'd do!!! I can't believe she insulted you after you send her a gift!! That IS really rude!!!:mad:
The delivery could have been much, much better but I have to sorta agree with her. It does annoy the heck out of me when seeing the shorthand writing in other places but IM chats.
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I'm so sorry this happened to you Cher, after all your thoughtfulness! Having two kids & many nieces and nephews in college or recently graduated, I can tell you that they all LOVE getting snail mail, especially with goodies; Since we talk on line all the time, we certainly use those little shortcuts! I cannot imagine one of them sending a note back like the one you got; I know I wouldn't be sending any further cards until I heard an explaination from her! I bet she'd notice soon enough that she's not getting any mail & wonder why; hopefully she'll realize her error and apologize; Good luck with your own work!
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Well, first of all - I think it's rude to correct someone in that manner in this circumstance! To answer your question though - I (this is just MY opinion), I do not like to get notes and/or e-mail with this type of 'short-hand'......... now, I don't mind it as part of a cute card design (on the front of a card) but as far as actually using it as a form of writing....... I don't like it, but I'm not 'insulted'!!!!
:0)
- April C
What April said!! Your niece was beyond rude, though.
I agree that she was out of line. I would never have done that. I'd be happy receiving something in the mail. Maybe she isn't internet educated. I've noticed a lot of times people who are on line or on forums for example, use this type of abbreviated "english". I would write her back explaining that you know how to spell, and you appreciate her pointing out the obvious. And maybe explain some etiquette rules to her as well. By the way...good job on going to school yourself! I too work full time, and just last week graduated with my B.S. degree. (I'm in my 30's).
I don't particularly like the use of letters for words, but that's just me. If someone had sent me a handmade card and gifts I would not have corrected them. Your niece was definitely rude.
I agree with thuskins, only send cutesy misspelled stuff (if anything!) from now on.
I'm another person who doesn't care for the practice of replacing words with letters, but I'm in no way insulted by it. I would be, however, beyond insulted with that note from your niece. I'm so sorry she said those things to you. You were being so kind and generous to send her fun mail, just to have her be needlessly and inexplicably cruel in response. Again, I'm sorry she hurt your feelings and was so rude to you and hope that she apologizes immediately.
She should be glad she is getting any mail at all! I have to ask though - is she an English major? I have a friend who was who couldn't help correcting EVERYONE around her when they spoke. It use to drive us nuts. She probably would have said the same thing (which would NOT have gone over well)!
Dear Niece, You are not going to recieve anything else from me, as I will be far to busy in my remedial english classes. Thanks for pointing that out for me.
I can't believe how rude a person can be. She should be happy that someone even write's to her. I think you have every right to be hurt and I think it would be awhile before I wrote her again.
Cher - while I agree that what she did was really rude an out of line, I would implore you to: (1) cut her a little slack (more on that in a sec); and (2) let her know now, in a non-passive agressive way (no matter how good that would feel) that she hurt your feelings with her response to your attempt at being hip.
The reason I would recommend you cut your neice a little slack - Although I am rapidly getting further and further away from it, I still remember being in college, and that is a pretty turbulent time, as well as a really self-absorbed time for many kids. You are just starting to learn how to manipulate the world around you with out direct correction from your parents. Sometimes you make bad judgment calls as a result. At least I did - I couldn't tell you the number of mistakes in dealing with people/relationships during those years - and those are just the things that were actually brought to my attention in one way or another. And I can only assume I made countless other stupid mistakes and hurt peoples feelings in ways I didn't realize at the time that were not brought to my attention.
Also, especially in your first year in college, you can get so absorbed in the academic thing that it is easy to get kind of judgmental - especially about something like writing (they drill that into you!). However you are also just grown up enough that a reality check at that age is likely to work, and in fact, a note from you explaining (in a kind, unemotional way) how her letter made you feel, would probably actually have a pretty big impact on her. You have been a very kind aunt so far, it strikes me that it would be out of your character to write her off forever for a mistake as dumb as this one.
Just my two cents. Hope you are able to save your relationship with your neice!
Dear Niece, You are not going to recieve anything else from me, as I will be far to busy in my remedial english classes. Thanks for pointing that out for me.
Love Auntie
MUST DITTO THIS ONE! IT IS EXACTLY WHAT I WOULD SEND!
These responses are a hoot!!! I love it! As a teacher, then an editor of a local newspaper, I can tell you that I have often wanted to grab my red grease pencil and correct notes from the sports editor, principal, my son's English teacher. However, I have always had more fun trying to mimic their mistakes...
My suggestion, is just ignore the bad manners. Keep peace. Remember, this could be the final time you hear from the child. When she grows older, she may come to see how she was so thoughtless.
I don't want to be a downer, but my ex-husband used to say, "Hey, it's one more day above the ground. I don't have time to waste on pettiness." He said that at least once a day during our 14 years of marriage. He died 3 years ago after being diagnosed with cancer only 4 months prior.
Now I have cancer for the second time in my life. This time I have been given just 3 short years. I just want to be happy. If the people in my life don't want to be happy too, then that's their problem. I try to get along with everyone. Life's too short. Just ask my 6 year old...
As much as I love Consuelo et al.'s suggestions to this point, I have to agree most with Jenre Lawyer's suggestion.
To answer the OP, I find using "letter words" like U and R very distracting and difficult to read, and whenever I come across it I tend to skim and not put as much effort into trying to figure out what the person is saying when there is a paragraph full of those kinds of abbreviations.
However, I really like the idea of using U and R, etc. on a series of funky cards. I think that would be fun. :-)
R U insulted w/ Letters as Words?
