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I love the idea of Happy Divorce. How about "What were you thinking?"
I use the old "You did what?!" stamp a lot for these type situations, but dang...I would buy a newly designed Dysfunctional Flexible Phrases set in a heartbeat!
There certainly needs to be a ***Warning you will be peeing all over yourself when you read this thread* Alert! You girls crack me up! Thanks for the laugh but I have to go shower now!
My dear old dad has been legally divorced 5 times but only legally married 4 times!! Not that's not a typo - the 5th marriage was performed by someone who was never legally allowed to do marriages in the state of Ohio. However, the probate court accepted the marriage license and has them down as married. So when it came time to get rid of "wife" no. 5 it was just quicker, cheaper and easier to divorce her as she never knew she wasn't legally married!
Oh how did I even forget this part - 2 of the wives were sisters and one of them was a stripper!
Can we say dysfunctional with a capital D !!!
I'm so glad that I can poke fun of this - otherwise I probably would be deeply emotionally scarred or heavily medicated
I work at the jail and at least 2-3 times a day someone describes their ex as my baby's mama. Is that an ex girlfriend? exwife? one night stand that delivered a baby? I don't get that answer!
Art is intended to provoke an emotion from a total stranger. If you�ve succeeded in this, consider yourself an artist. Paper Shanks Blog. Love me or hate me, you are still talking about me
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omg! Y'all are toooo funny! I agree - THIS is why stamping is cheaper than therapy!! :lol:
Would you really SEND cards like these? Would those people who "need" them understand them?? Or would they be offended...after all - if they are like MY ex....it is the REST of the world that is wrong, not him!! :rolleyes:
__________________ inkifingers aka julie
~~If something offends you, lighten up, get over it, and move on!~~
Oh man, if you only KNEW! My step sister married her step uncle (her mom's second husbands brother!) So her mom is also her sister in law, her step dad is her brother in law, her step grandma is her MIL, her step grandma is grandma AND great grandma to her kids, her own mother is aunt AND grandma.... Grandpa is also uncle... YIKES!
Yep...we definitely need a "Happy Divorce" stamp. Or "Congratulations marrying the woman you left your wife and kids for" or "Good luck finding another job as a pastor now that you've had an affair with the church divorcee"
These are all for my brother of course Is it bad that I hope they come out with a "Happy Divorce" stamp before he and his adultress get divorced?
It just helps to know I'm not the only one saying "Huh??" when it comes to my family!
Hey, you can use It all Adds up on page 65--- just handwrite a minus sign!
Woman + Man - Love = Couple with a Line through it!
Woman + Man + Man + Party Hat = The partying 3some!
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Quote:
Originally Posted by FourAliments
You design it, MamaK, and I'll buy it! Between DH's family and mine, they put the FUN in dysfunctional. On May 20th, my sister (she's 31) will be marrying DH's step great uncle (he's 33) so she will be my sister and my great step aunt-in-law, as well as my DH's mom's sister-in-law. Whew!
OMG are we related?? Could we possibly be step-cousin-sister-aunt in laws?? This sounds like my sister's family! I swear I have to write it all down with arrows to keep it straight. Try doing a family tree on THAT side LOL!
OMG are we related?? Could we possibly be step-cousin-sister-aunt in laws?? This sounds like my sister's family! I swear I have to write it all down with arrows to keep it straight. Try doing a family tree on THAT side LOL!
Ya know...with this level of dysfunctionality, I wouldn't be surprised if we were related ;). DH is the oldest of 8 half siblings, so it's possible. I'm open to adopting stampin' relatives anyway as I'm the only one with inky fingers in the bunch .
Location: Stampin' with the new rubbah the posse sent me!!
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Quote:
Originally Posted by FourAliments
Ya know...with this level of dysfunctionality, I wouldn't be surprised if we were related ;). DH is the oldest of 8 half siblings, so it's possible. I'm open to adopting stampin' relatives anyway as I'm the only one with inky fingers in the bunch .
Location: Stampin' with the new rubbah the posse sent me!!
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mamakimberly
Hey, you can use It all Adds up on page 65--- just handwrite a minus sign!
Woman + Man - Love = Couple with a Line through it!
Woman + Man + Man + Party Hat = The partying 3some!
Woman + Man + Party Hat = Baby
There's lots SU didn't add to that set!
OMG that is too funny! I never concidered that! Or how about (wo)man +(wo)man=?? using an alpha?
My friend's sister in law cheated on her hubby by meeting someone online. They have a child together, so hers would be woman + man + computer from computer quips (kinda big)= baby
This is hilarious. I like the 'Happy Divorce" stamp idea. When my DD's divorce was final a couple of years ago, her friend got her a cake that said "Happy Divorce". She loved it.
This thread reminds me of the show "Who's Line is it Anyway" Especially the games called: Scenes From a Hat or World's Worst. Some of the things they say on there could be made into rubberstamps!
All about you set: Good for U... and your 5th wife!
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How about stamps that say
"I can't believe you put a tattoo there!" or
"I don't think neon green was intended to be a hair color." or
"You pierced your what?!?" or
"Red eyeshadow isn't a fashion statement"
They could call the set - You Really Shouldn't Have.
I thought of a bunch of x-rated phrases, but I seriously doubt that SU would even consider those. Think of all the phrases your mother/father said to you as you were growing up. Wouldn't some of those make good stamps?
Sue
__________________ Who would have thought that paper, ink & rubber could create a priceless keepsake or give me treasured friends.
Hey, you can use It all Adds up on page 65--- just handwrite a minus sign!
Woman + Man - Love = Couple with a Line through it!
Woman + Man + Man + Party Hat = The partying 3some!
Woman + Man + Party Hat = Baby
There's lots SU didn't add to that set!
Just when I thought that was the most useless set I own! Who knew there could be so many things to celebrate!
__________________ Jenna
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I made it! Dec 2006-July 2007!
My nonstamping, weight-loss blog sort of.
We recently made a DVD for my parent's 50th wedding anniversary. While we are going through the pictures we are like nope, can't use that one, has my ex in it, can't use that one - has my brother's first wife in it, nope, brother's second wife, nope, my mom's first husband, etc. We had YEARS that we couldn't inlcude because each picture had someone's ex in it!
__________________ Debbie
I am extraordinarily patient, provided I get my own way in the end. - Margaret Thatcher
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How about "Congratulations on wedding #3, hope it works better that the last!!"
My girlfriend was joking about those welcome name plates for in your porches, she siad she need one with magnetic letters so she could just change it rather that get new
How about "Congratulations on wedding #3, hope it works better that the last!!"
My girlfriend was joking about those welcome name plates for in your porches, she siad she need one with magnetic letters so she could just change it rather that get new
You guys are cracking me up again! I needed this today...thanks for the laugh!
I was having such a bad day!
these are hi-larious!
The statements that make me laugh are those that sound like compliments or concern but aren't totally.
MIL from h&ll- type statements:
" I wish I had the guts to wear that"
"nice... outfit"
"you look good ... today"( or "... for once!")
kind of like" really... I like you"
tooo funny
"here, you'll need a mint"( soap, candle -implying halitosis, B.O., dim-witted)
"what an interesting idea for a hairdo"( outfit, career)
" is that a job nowadays?"
that's the dysfunction in my family...passive aggressive ignorance!
The big cardstore slogan is "when you care enough to send the very best"
personally,
I'd just like to give back as good as I get! just once!
(evil grin)
How about really middle-of-the-road greetings?
" I hope your day doesn't totally suck"
"Enjoy your birthday, may all your bills come tomorrow"
" Always look on the bright side - you'll never be the victim of identity theft!"
"Happy birthday geezer ---We will celebrate your legacy when you finally leave this world"
Wow, I'm still really in touch with my dark side today.
more laughs please!
__________________ if your path is boobytrapped you are probably on the right track to treasure BUT if everything is inordinately hard you probably are rushing to the final exam in the wrong place a day early.
This is the funniest thread ever. I thought of another one!
Congratulations on your new baby... The product of your affair!
V
This reminds me of that new stamp set It All Adds Up on page 65. When the catty came out we were joking about needing to move things around in it. Like man + woman + baby = ring, etc.
D'oh! I just realized mamak had already brought these up!
Could we add something about a biological mother dis-owning her son? Like a happy mothers day to the lady that USED TO BE my mom as if I cared enough to make one anyway :rolleyes:
Ok ladies, I've got a couple of big ones.
How about one for my sister who's my mother?
and one for my siblings (aunts & uncles) that says thanks for keeping my adoption a secret?
etc.
Found out at the age of 33 that my eldest sister (19 years older than me) was really my mother and her parents (my grandparents) adopted me but never told me. And there are 8 children between oldest and myself(youngest).
Now I'm getting even more confused and its my life.
i need some stamping!!!!
I would have to have a Monster In Law stamp for my mother in law who announced at the wedding we were at a couple of weeks ago that I am a stamping pack rat. Witch! - well that could be another stamp! we'll see when she gets another stamped card!
Have you ever tried to explain to a minister why a 10 year old girl is calling your husband uncle-brother? The poor guy was marrying her mom to her step-dad and completely confused.
P.S. I love the term Step-Monster - I have one of my own.
Try explaining to a minister why a 10 year old girl keeps calling your husband uncle-brother? The poor guy was marrying her mom to her step-dad and he was completely lost.
P.S. I love the term Step-Monster and I have a Step-thing of my own
Try explaining to a minister why a 10 year old girl keeps calling your husband uncle-brother? The poor guy was marrying her mom to her step-dad and he was completely lost.
OK... the words "summons", "attorney" or "Settlement" have GOT to be in there somewhere.... and let's not forget "Therapy", "Counseling", and "PROZAC"!
